HomeAsiaPakistanPARTLY FACETIOUS: Will Nawaz land in Pakistan on Oct 21? - Opinion

PARTLY FACETIOUS: Will Nawaz land in Pakistan on Oct 21? – Opinion

“Is it too much to ask for three to four hundred thousand of one’s voters to come out and welcome one!” “I reckon it is, I mean I am struggling to make ends meet and the fault lies with The Samdhi and his economically flawed policy decisions from 27 September 2022 till the dissolution of the assembly on 9 August 2023.”

“But the guy performed well from 2013 to 2017 – isn’t that the line taken by Samdhi Number 1.”


“With what? That the economy was booming during Dar stint number three was it?”

“No, he did much damage to the economy then too – he controlled the rupee dollar parity then too and that led to plummeting exports, lower remittance inflows through official channels which, in turn, led to The Man Who Must Remain Nameless inheriting the highest ever current account deficit in our history. And don’t forget The Samdhis’s immediate successor, an aspirant in the Samdhi’s party – Miftah Ismail – had to make corrections to the flawed policies of his predecessor at the insistence of the IMF team…”

“But at the time inflation was down, the deficit was down, the…”

“Subsidies were given from borrowed funds particularly borrowed from abroad by presenting an economically fallacious argument that the interest rate was lower abroad then domestically and that idiocy has also come home to roost now.”

“Oh So what did I say that you agreed with?”

“That in any relationship Nawaz Sharif will always be number one.”

“Good heavens, don’t be facetious. But one question: how many people in the jalsa will satisfy Nawaz Sharif?”

“The more the merrier.”

“No but seriously, is he thinking of beating the numbers in the 2011 jalsa of The Man Who Must Remain Nameless?”

“I am not sure, could be the welcome given to Benazir Bhutto on her return from exile.”

“I am not too sure about that.”

“21 October will tell.”

“I am still not sure if he will actually land in this country!”

“Are you a supporter of The Man Who Must Remain Nameless? Spreading a rumour that he may not return to the country on that date may reduce the numbers going to the venue to welcome him!”

“Sorry that was not my intent.”

“Anyway an observation: Benazir Bhutto was in an open truck on her return from exile which was attacked by terrorists. The Man Who Must Remain Nameless was also shot at while in an open truck…”

“I don’t recall Nawaz Sharif ever standing on an open truck. I mean correct me if I am wrong!”

“No I don’t recall either. And that is why a helicopter will transport him to the venue. By the way who is going to provide the helicopter? I am not sure that the Sharifs own one, not that they cannot afford to but…”

“I heard a helicopter was procured for his great grandchildren and is parked next to the cemetery in Jaati Umra.”

“Don’t be facetious.”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2023



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